


In the Pale Moonlight

by beifongingperfection (pristineungift)



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra, Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Adventure, Angst, Canon Compliant, Canonical Character Death, Drama, F/M, Gen, Romance, Tragedy, Tragic Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-11
Updated: 2012-09-29
Packaged: 2017-11-11 23:02:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/483860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pristineungift/pseuds/beifongingperfection
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A tale of two lovers who realized everything too late. This story begins with Lin and Tarrlok's first meeting, and goes through the entirety of S1 of Legend of Korra. Completely canon compliant, it offers a different interpretation of events.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just a Dance

**Author's Note:**

  * For [teaanemone](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=teaanemone).



> **This story was inspired by teaanemone's wonderful art.** She was also kind enough to draw the picture of Lin and Tarrlok dancing that is featured on the cover.
> 
>  **The title is a reference to the phrase:** "Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"
> 
>  **All lines you recognize** are from _Legend of Korra_ episodes.

  


 

It all started the night of Pema and Tenzin’s engagement party.

It was a big event. Tenzin finally marrying hopefully meant the birth of more airbenders. It seemed like all of Republic City had shown up at Air Temple Island for a night of dancing and revelry.

Lin hadn’t been invited. Of course she hadn’t. It would be too uncomfortable for the happy couple.

And yet she was still the Chief of Police. So many important people all gathered in one location made an enticing target for the Triads, and that meant a security detail for Air Temple Island. A security detail that Lin was leading herself.

It hurt, to watch from a distance.

It hurt, to see Tenzin so happy.

It hurt to realize that she hadn’t seen him that way in a very long time. Since before Avatar Aang died.

Ever since he had become the last airbender, Tenzin had felt the weight of that legacy, and all the duties it entailed. But for Tenzin, it wasn’t merely a duty. It was a joy. A long held dream.

And for Lin, a nightmare that made her wake from time to time in a cold sweat.

Swallowing thickly, Lin put all that from her mind, determined not to let her personal feelings interfere with her job. She would fade into the background, just another body in a uniform, moving from post to post to talk with her officers, silent as a spirit.

And at the end of the night, she would go home without Tenzin and his family ever knowing she was there.

“Chief Bei Fong,” came a rich, deep voice.

Lin turned to see a young man. He was tall and dark, and just to complete the cliché, really very handsome. His features marked him as having Water Tribe blood, if he wasn’t actually from one of the tribes. It was difficult to tell in Republic City. But his clothes were traditional – rich blue fabrics, trimmed in white, much like the clothes Lin was used to seeing Katara wear at events like this, though the designs were a little different. He wore his long dark hair in three ponytails that dangled down his back.

“I’m sorry,” she told him, wishing he wouldn’t talk so loud. He might as well be announcing her presence. “Have we met?”

“I haven’t yet had the pleasure,” the man took Lin’s hand, bowing to press a kiss to it. She raised a brow, bemused.

“You’re trying very hard to be charming, Mr…?”

“Tarrlok. Councilman Tarrlok, actually. I’m the new representative for the Northern Water Tribe. I was awarded the seat a few weeks ago. It seems I got to Republic City just in time for the party.”

So, he wasn’t as young as Lin had initially thought. Still one of the youngest to ever hold a council seat, but he was at least older than Pema.

Lin frowned.

_At least older than Pema._

Funny, how her thoughts kept straying back to that.

Lin turned her hand in Tarrlok’s to grasp his forearm firmly. He treated her as a refined lady, but she responded as a seasoned soldier. “It’s good to meet you, Councilman Tarrlok.”

To his credit, Tarrlok took it in stride, adjusting his hand to return her warrior’s clasp.

He smiled at her, one dimple appearing in his cheek, his teeth very white against his skin.

“If you’ll excuse me, councilman, I have to get back to my duties.”

“Must you?” Tarrlok asked, putting a wounded look on his face. “Your officers seem to have everything well in hand. I was hoping to spend the evening with you. Being fresh off the boat as I am, I could certainly use a guide to navigate the choppy waters of the Republic City political sea.”

Lin stared.

The silence became awkward.

“Did I lay it on too thick?” Tarrlok asked once it was obvious Lin wasn’t going to speak.

That startled her into a snorting laugh. “Just a little. Talk like that might work on the other council members, but I’m the Chief of Police. Honesty is better.”

Tarrlok smiled again, and this time it was a smaller, snakeshark-like grin. “Honesty? An interesting idea. I guess I could give it a try…” He moved closer to her, presumably so that they wouldn’t be overheard. “The truth is that I’m young, and new, and I’ll need strong political allies to make a difference in the republic. You are Chief Bei Fong. You’re the daughter of a legend. And more than that, people respect you. I want to be seen with you. I want you be my friend.”

“Or at least look as if I am?” Lin finished, taken aback at Tarrlok’s confession.

And impressed. It took some backbone to face her head-on this way.

Lin very purposefully did not look at Tenzin.

“I’d prefer you actually like me, but if an appearance of friendship is all I can manage, I’ll take it. For now, anyway,” Tarrlok said jovially.

From a distance, they could be discussing anything. People might even think they were flirting.

Lin snorted. As if she would be interested in a boy like Tarrlok, no matter how ambitious and intelligent.

Pema and Tenzin went to the center of the room and started dancing together, and Lin was reminded that the age difference between herself and Tarrlok was several years less than the one between the newly engaged couple.

A rush of irrational anger shooting up from her toes, she fought to keep her face blank.

She shouldn’t be angry. Pema wasn’t the source of Lin’s problems with Tenzin. Lin knew that now. What was bad there had gone bad long before. She had just been too stubborn to see it.

But she was angry all the same.

“I heard that she’s already pregnant,” Tarrlok whispered, following the direction of Lin’s gaze. “That’s the reason behind the rushed engagement. Of course, it could just be a rumor.”

Scowling, and not caring who saw it, Lin cut her eyes at Tarrlok. Didn’t he know about Tenzin? Was he being purposefully cruel?

But Tarrlok’s face was smooth. Guileless.

He _had_ said he was new in town.

Lin took a deep breath and let it out slowly, trying to master her ire.

She didn’t see the triumphant look in Tarrlok’s eye as soon as she turned away.

“Dance with me?” Tarrlok said suddenly, holding out his hands.

“So you can be seen dancing with Chief Bei Fong?” Lin snorted, crossing her arms.

But Tarrlok was persistent. “I could just be a man who wants to dance with a beautiful lady.”

Lin grit her teeth, feeling that he was mocking her. “I thought we established flattery and fancy talk isn’t going to work with me, kid.”

“So we did.” Tarrlok laid his hands on Lin’s arms, gently prying at her fingers, trying to pull her onto the dance floor.

Lin was about to tell him to get his hands off her before she did it for him, when he said, “And I’m still being honest. You’re beautiful, and I want to dance with you.” Leaning forward, his breath tickling her ear, he rumbled, “And I’m not a kid.”

“I don’t dance,” Lin protested, blushing even as she did so.

How pathetic. She hadn’t blushed since –

She realized with a start she hadn’t felt this way in years. She’d been with Tenzin for so long, everyone knew she was taken, and now – now she was Chief Bei Fong. People found her too intimidating for idle flirtations.

Except for, apparently, ambitious young councilmen.

“It’s easy,” Tarrlok needled. “It’s just like bending. Pretend we’re sparring.”

“You’re a waterbender?” Lin let Tarrlok pull her to the edge of the dance floor.

In answer, Tarrlok assumed a waterbending stance that actually looked quite stylish, and moved in a slow circle, waterbending the punch out of people’s glasses and making it swirl in a ribbon of color around the room before sending it back again.

“Very pretty,” Lin told him as he put his left hand on her waist and took her right hand in his. “Maybe you missed your calling.”

“I did consider running away from home once,” Tarrlok answered flatly. “I should have joined the circus.”

Lin stepped on Tarrlok’s foot, then frowned, biting her lip. She was one of the best earthbenders in the world, but she always felt like an awkward little turtleduck on the dance floor.

“Just like bending forms, remember?” Tarrlok said gently, though Lin could tell he was amused. “Just follow my lead.”

Lin made another misstep, grunting in frustration. “This isn’t working. You follow my lead instead,” she commanded. Grabbing Tarrlok’s hand, she moved it up to her shoulder, then put hers on his waist. The tempo of the music increased as the band transitioned into a different song.

Lin paused for a moment, counting out the beats in her head. Then she started a metalbending form, doing her best to keep to the rhythm. She stepped forward, and Tarrlok stepped back, stumbling at first, but quickly adapting. His movements were more fluid than hers, his waterbending training showing through. Even his hair and cloak swayed with the music, sharply contrasted to Lin’s severely pinned black curls and the rigid metal plates of her uniform.

Lin had no idea if they looked good, ridiculous, or somewhere in between, but the point was that they weren’t stepping on each other anymore. It wasn’t until the song was over and people started clapping that she realized they had attracted something of an audience.

Heedless of the onlookers, or maybe because of them, Tarrlok pulled her close, giving the impression of an intimate moment. “You are a spirited dancer, Lin. May I call you Lin?” he murmured against her cheek.

Seeing Tenzin staring at them, his already red face rapidly turning purple, Lin felt immediately ashamed of herself. She wasn’t even supposed to be here. She was certainly not supposed to be drawing attention to herself by dancing, of all things. Tenzin probably thought she was trying to ruin the party. She would apologize –

She stopped mid-thought. Why should she have to apologize for her mere presence? If it made Tenzin uncomfortable, that was his problem. Lin refused to feel bad for dancing with Tarrlok.

It was just a dance, after all.

“Yes, you can call me Lin,” she answered the handsome younger man, turning her face so that her lips almost – but not quite – brushed his.

Tenzin be damned.


	2. More Than Convenient

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lines you recognize are from episodes of _Legend of Korra_.

_Eleven Years Later_

Lin stirred, woken by her bed shifting beneath her. Opening her eyes, she saw Tarrlok illuminated in the faint morning light. He was still naked, his hair loose, cascading down his back.

“Sneaking out early?” she asked, playing with the ends of his hair with her fingertips.

He turned to glare at her, catching her hand in a hard grip. “You’re the one that insists on secrecy, Chief Bei Fong.”

Lin sighed. Tarrlok was always surly when he’d just woken up, and very prone to the dramatic. “Is this going to be one of those days where you storm out and act like you don’t know me until I corner you in a dark alleyway?”

“It might!” Tarrlok sniffed, standing to find his clothes. They were carefully folded. Tarrlok was fussy about wrinkles.

Lin had left her clothes in an untidy heap in the center of the floor. She’d had _other things_ on her mind the night before, when they were undressing. Tarrlok stepped over the pile, a frown on his face, and then bent over to pick up his undergarments.

Lin admired the view. Tarrlok had aged well since that night they first danced together. He was broader now, his jaw fuller. More man than boy.

“I’ve told you why I prefer our relationship be discreet,” Lin said as she watched Tarrlok huff around her bedroom. He started to violently brush his hair. Lin left him to it.

There was a reason she kept hers short.

“Yes, yes. You’ve been part of a public couple before and there’s pressure and reporters constantly asking about private things. And you won’t have me using your name for leverage in council meetings. I know,” Tarrlok pouted.

He could be so petulant. But he made up for his histrionics in other ways. All that pent up aggression made him a very dynamic lover.

Lin rolled over, stretching, then wincing when her spine cracked. She hated getting older. First her hair had turned grey, and then her joints had started aching on days when it was going to rain. No one ever mentioned that no matter how in shape you were, how powerful a bender, all that training and fighting still caught up with you.

Puffing her cheeks, Lin blew her hair out of her eyes. “It’s not that I’m ashamed of you, or anything like that. But people would think –”

“You mean _Tenzin_ would think,” Tarrlok interrupted.

Lin sat up, fisting her hands in the bed sheets. Never talking about Tenzin was one of the unspoken rules of their relationship, along with never asking Tarrlok about his family, and never saying ‘I love you.’

Tarrlok was trying to hurt her. For whatever reason, he wanted to fight this morning.

“Oh, just get out. Go do whatever it is you’re up so early to do.”

“I have to go make sure everything’s ready for the gala I’m throwing for Avatar Korra,” Tarrlok announced as he pulled his coat on.

Already irritated, that pronouncement sent Lin’s mood plummeting.

Korra.

The young Avatar had waltzed into town as if she could just step into Aang’s shoes, then torn up a city block and had the audacity to assume Lin should love her just because Aang had been friends with Lin’s mother. And now Lin’s _lover_ was throwing a party for the young woman, as if she were a hero already. As if she had shed blood and taken wounds for this city.

Korra was still young. Her skin was unmarked. Her hair wasn’t grey. She didn’t know what it was to sacrifice, to be pounded against the pavement by life, to be burned by gangsters, and hemmed in by politicians, and still get up every morning to do it all over again.

She didn’t know what it was to be left. Unappreciated. Unwanted.

Lin glanced at Tarrlok, a sour taste in her mouth. “You shouldn’t encourage her. I need her to stay out of police business.”

“And I need her to join my task force to stop the Equalists,” Tarrlok countered.

Standing to confront him, still intimidating in spite of her nudity, Lin poked Tarrlok in the chest. “I’ve told you to back off with that task force of yours. This is my job, Tarrlok. You should stay behind a desk, where you belong.”

Tarrlok’s eyes widened, as they sometimes did when he was angry, and then he grabbed her shoulders, his nails digging into her skin. “You aren’t being reasonable, Lin! These Equalists are dangerous, and I want them off the streets.”

“You want to be the hero credited with getting them off the streets, you mean.”

“If I can strengthen my position in the city while getting rid of a dangerous threat, I don’t see why I shouldn’t –”

“Because the Equalists are dangerous, just like you said. This is a job for the real police. Dammit, Tarrlok, this isn’t one of your political games! You could really be hurt. If Amon catches you – ”

Lin wasn’t sure when she had started shouting. Tarrlok always brought out this side in her. He could infuriate her as no one else.

“Amon could just as easily catch you,” Tarrlok said, voice suddenly quiet. Broken. “Please, Lin. You aren’t as young as you used to be.”

Lin flexed her jaw, her green eyes flashing. “You didn’t mind that last night.”

Tarrlok blinked, visibly taken aback. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”

Lin turned away from him. “I’m not retiring, Tarrlok. Not for you, not for Tenz- for anyone. I like fighting, and protecting people. I’m good at it.”

Tarrlok was silent. When Lin looked over her shoulder at him, he was just staring, an unfathomable expression on his face.

“Just go set up for your party.”

**-l-**

Lin patrolled the banquet hall where Tarrlok was holding his party for Korra, resentment simmering in her gut.

Tarrlok had spared no expense – the music was elegant, reminding Lin of that first night they danced, there was a fine selection of food, and everyone he had invited had turned out wearing their best clothes.

Except for Lin, of course. She wore her uniform, as always, her short grey hair framing her face. She couldn’t remember if she had brushed it that morning.

Tarrlok himself was resplendent in his Water Tribe garb, his hair contrasting beautifully against the fabric. Lin could tell by the way the lights shone off the dark strands that he had used his favorite hair oil. If she got close enough to him, she would smell flowers.

And all of this extravagance and finery was just so Tarrlok could try to maneuver Korra into helping him interfere in Lin’s job.

Lin frowned, catching sight of Tenzin in the crowd. Not feeling up to one of their awkward repartees, Lin ducked, moving away at a diagonal.

“Chief Bei Fong, I believe you and Avatar Korra have already met.”

Lin whirled to see Tarrlok standing next to Korra. They looked good, both of them in Water Tribe blue, their dark hair styled with ornamental pieces carved from mammothwhale ivory. They looked like they belonged together – not enough age between them to be father and daughter, but maybe brother and sister.

Or husband and wife.

Lin felt like she was going to be sick.

Glaring at Korra, she said, “Just because the city's throwing you this big to-do, don't think you're something special. You've done absolutely nothing to deserve this.”

Refusing to look at Tarrlok, unwilling to see his reaction, Lin spun on her heel and stalked away.

**-l-**

Tarrlok found Lin at home later that night. She was wearing a soft green robe and sitting in her rock garden, looking up at the stars.

“You left before my moment of triumph,” he told her. He was still in his party clothes.

“I heard on the radio. You put Korra on the spot and got her to join your task force. A victory for you, a headache for me.”

Tarrlok came to sit next to her on the bench of carved stone. Lin’s mother had made it herself, with earthbending. Tarrlok usually complained that the bench was too hard, and that with the Bei Fong fortune Lin should invest in some cushions, at least.

But tonight he just put his hand on Lin’s leg, and slumped back so that he, too, was looking up at the stars. “I’m trying to help you, Lin.”

“You’re trying to help yourself.”

“They don’t have to be mutually exclusive,” Tarrlok sighed. “How often do I have to tell you that?”

Lin shook her head. “Really helping someone – really caring for someone means doing it even when it’s inconvenient for you.”

Tarrlok sat up, looking down at her. “Is that what you think you are? Convenient?”

Lin turned her head to meet his eyes. “Aren’t I? I’ve been convenient for a very long time. But Avatar Korra is convenient now.”

There it was then. Lin hadn’t realized the true depth of her fear until she said it out loud.

But surely it wasn’t that farfetched? After all, she’d been left for a younger woman before. Why not again, especially as this time her lover was much younger than her?

“You’ve always enjoyed power and politics, Tarrlok. You love playing the game. Korra is a much better game piece than I am. The aging police chief who can’t even stop one man in a mask doesn’t really compare to the young new Avatar.”

Tarrlok sputtered, his grip on her leg tightening as his brows shot up in surprise, and then back down in outrage. “Are you telling me to leave you for a half-baked, sixteen year old Avatar?”

“I’m telling you it wouldn’t surprise me if you did,” Lin sat up, pushing Tarrlok’s hand off her leg. “You’ve been sending her flowers, and candy, and you even bought her a car! That’s a bit much just to persuade her to join your task force, even by your standards.”

“How do you know I’ve been sending her things?” Tarrlok demanded.

“I’m the chief. It’s my job to know what’s going on in my city.”

Tarrlok smirked.

Lin gave him an odd look. She was used to his changing moods, but he didn’t usually go from angry to smug this quickly.

“You’ve been having me followed again, haven’t you?” he asked.

Lin blinked, feeling off balance. “Well… yes. For your safety!” she protested.

She worried about him. He was a prominent bender in a city full of anti-bender sentiment. She routinely had Tenzin and Korra and the more noticeable probenders followed as well.

“Why do you look so happy about it?” she continued suspiciously.

Tarrlok’s smirk became a full lipped grin. “Because it means you care.”

Lin was startled into a laugh.

“You’re happy I had you followed without your consent because spying on you means I care?”

“Yes,” Tarrlok confirmed, sliding down on the bench again to lay his head on Lin’s shoulder.

She stroked his hair. “Sometimes, you’re really disturbing.”

They sat together in peace for quite some time, underneath the pale moonlight. It was only when their backs started to ache from sitting on the bench that they moved.

“I’m not going to stop pushing the task force,” Tarrlok told her as they went inside.

“I know,” she replied. “And I’m not going to stop being difficult about it.”


	3. This is War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lines you recognize are from the show.

Tarrlok sat in the quiet serenity of his office within City Hall. It was decorated in a tasteful blend of modern and traditional styles from both Republic City and the Northern Water Tribe, giving the impression that while Tarrlok was very much invested in the city’s future, he wouldn’t forget his roots.

That was exactly the point he wanted made, of course. He would never forget where he had come from. His family, his tribe, his _father_ – they all defined him, and his vision for himself. His future.

And the future of the republic.

He consulted the papers before him, making careful notes.

All things considered, his task force was doing well. The initial successful raids had done much to lend the idea credence. The Avatar leaving the force after her failed attempt to duel Amon was unfortunate, but wouldn’t be the death of the movement if Tarrlok had his people put it about that she was neglecting her responsibilities in favor of playing a silly game like probending.

In fact, it might be better that it had worked out this way. It made Korra look childish and afraid, like the young girl she was, while Tarrlok could be seen to be doing the job she _should_ be doing. Keeping the balance.

He smirked. Tarrlok the Avatar.

It was an old daydream. A story he used to tell himself at night, when the dread of the approaching full moon and the inevitable ‘hunting trip’ began to build. Why wouldn’t he want to be the Avatar? In his young mind, the Avatar was the only thing Yakone had ever feared. The only thing more powerful.

That was until Noatok had –

Tarrlok cut off those thoughts.

He turned instead to the reports in front of him. Lin had filed yet another petition to bring the task force under her purview and remove Tarrlok from the list of active operatives.

He traced his fingers over her handwriting, a ghost of a smile playing over his lips.

Being abrasive and combative was how Lin showed she cared. If she was supportive of him leading raids, if she didn’t oppose his task force at all, well then that would be a sign that he meant no more to her than what she’d had for breakfast that morning.

Steepling his fingers, he leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes to listen to the soothing sounds of the waterfall that flowed down the wall behind him.

The task force had made Lin respect him in ways she hadn’t before. She’d always known he was trained to fight, but he had few opportunities to put those skills into practice outside of training exercises. Lin valued bravery, hard work, and sacrifice.

Tarrlok was showing her he was capable of those things.

And if his actions served more than one purpose, well… that was all to the good. If Lin wouldn’t slow down on her own, Tarrlok would slow her down, by hook or by crook.

His quiet contemplation was interrupted by his assistant bursting through the door.

“Councilman Tarrlok! Councilman Tarrlok!”

“What is it?” Tarrlok frowned, irritated by the squeak of the man’s voice.

“It’s Amon, sir! He’s on the radio! He’s demanding the probending stadium be closed!”

Tarrlok stood and grabbed his coat. “Call a council meeting. Now!”

**-l-**

It was easy enough to get the council to agree they had to close the stadium. The blackmail material Tarrlok had on the council members from the Fire Nation, Earth Kingdom, and Southern Water Tribe insured they always voted with him, and for once Tenzin was not a voice of dissent.

The doors to the council chamber banged open, admitting Avatar Korra and her two probending teammates. Tarrlok narrowed his eyes, preparing to speak, but then Tenzin rose to his feet. Sitting back, Tarrlok decided to let Tenzin be the one to take the brunt of the Avatar’s temper.

“Korra, you shouldn't be here,” the airbender said. “This is a closed meeting.”

Her blue eyes sparking with a determination that Tarrlok admired, Korra fired back, “As the Avatar and a probending player, I have a right to be heard. You can't cancel the finals!”

“I know winning the championship means a lot to you,” Tenzin began in a soothing tone. “But as far as I'm concerned, we need to shut the arena down.”

“What about the rest of you?” Korra looked from one council member to the next, before zeroing in on Tarrlok. “Tarrlok, there's no way you're backing down from Amon, right?”

Weighing all the advantages and disadvantages of the possible answers he could give to such a charge, Tarrlok came to a quick decision. “Actually, Tenzin and I agree for once.”

There was nothing to be gained from keeping the arena open. Korra had already shown that she wouldn’t be bought, and Tarrlok wouldn’t give the Equalists such a large playing field for yet another anti-bender demonstration.

“The council is unanimous. We're closing the arena,” Tenzin said with an air of finality.

“No!” one of Korra’s teammates protested. The firebender. Tarrlok thought that one was called Mako.

“You can't!” chimed the other. Bolin?

Tarrlok couldn’t remember. He didn’t consider the boys to be important.

“ I-I don't understand,” Korra pleaded, looking at him with those big blue eyes. Just as someone else had looked at him once. “I thought you, of all people, would take a stand against Amon.”

Tarrlok grit his teeth, irritated by the shadow of an unwanted memory flitting around the edges of his mind. “While I am still committed to bringing that lunatic to justice, I will not put innocent lives at stake just so you and your friends can play a game.”

Mako raised his eyes to meet Tarrlok’s. “Probending might only be a game to you, but think of what it means to the city! Right now the arena is the one place where benders and non-benders gather together... in-in peace! To watch benders...”

“Beat each other up!” Bolin continued. “In peace! It's an inspiration to everyone!”

“I appreciate your naive idealism, but you're ignoring the reality of the situation,” Tarrlok began, only to be cut off by Korra.

“The reality is if you close the arena, you let Amon win!”

“Yes, exactly what she said! Yes!” the earthbender boy shouted, gesticulating wildly.

Not willing to have any more of his valuable time wasted, Tarrlok raised his voice. “I'm sorry, but our decision has been made. This meeting is adjourned.”

He raised his gavel, preparing to officially end the council meeting.

Before he could bring the wooden hammer down, a metal cable arched through the air, knocking the gavel from his hand and stinging his palm. Well past irritation and working his way towards righteous fury, Tarrlok turned toward the door to see who dared to –

Lin?

“I can't believe I'm saying this, but I agree with the Avatar,” Lin announced. She stood framed in the council chamber doorway, the metal cable she had just used to whip Tarrlok’s hand winding back into the left sleeve of her police uniform.

“You do?” Tarrlok asked, his mind racing. He barely heard Korra echo his question.

This changed things.

“I expected this kind of cut-and-run response from Tenzin,” Lin said, her eyes locked on Tarrlok’s face. “But the rest of you? Come on, show a little more backbone. It's time the benders of this city displayed some strength and unity against these Equalists.”

She was trying to rile him. Clever woman. She knew he’d jump at a chance to show Tenzin up in front of her.

“We must prevent the conflict between benders and non-benders from escalating into all-out war!” the airbender in question sputtered. “The council is not changing its position, Lin.”

Tarrlok  shifted his gaze to Tenzin. “Now just a moment. Let us hear what our esteemed Chief of Police has in mind.”

Lin didn’t smile. Nothing about her expression changed overtly, but Tarrlok knew her well. She was pleased with his response. He could tell. “If you keep the arena open, my metalbenders and I will provide extra security during the championship match. There's no better force to deal with the Chi Blockers. Our armor is impervious to their attacks.”

Now this was something. Seeing an opportunity, Tarrlok seized it.

“Are you saying that you will personally take responsibility for the safety of the spectators in the arena?”

Lin met him stare for stare. She knew he was issuing a challenge. “I guarantee it.”

“It is hard to argue with Chief Bei Fong's track record,” Tarrlok turned to the council, triumph singing through his veins. “If she is confident her elite officers can protect the arena, then she has my support. I am changing my vote.” He lifted his hand. “Who else is with me?”

All the other council members save Tenzin raised their hands, eager to keep Tarrlok from airing their dirty secrets for all the city to see.

Tarrlok turned back to the Avatar and her friends. “The arena stays open. Good luck on the finals.”

He smiled widely as the teenagers cheered, but his mind was far from probending.

If nothing happened, if the city’s police were able to keep the arena safe, then Lin would be very pleased with Tarrlok for supporting her. She would remember that he had stood by her when Tenzin hadn’t, yet again.

And if the Equalists attacked…

If the Equalists attacked, if the probenders were stripped of their bending, then Tarrlok would have all he needed to force Lin from her position as chief.

She would hate him for it, but she would be safe.

And that was what mattered.

**-l-**

Tarrlok sat in the stands of the probending arena. Not wanting to be recognized, he had discarded his usual distinctive Water Tribe clothes for a nondescript pair of brown linen pants and a faded red shirt. Instead of three ponytails, he tied his hair back in a topknot. He didn’t want to make a target of himself if the Equalists made it into the arena.

And he didn’t want Lin to know he was there. Whatever she claimed, his presence would distract her. He wanted a reason to force her out of office, not to see her hurt.

The announcer’s voice boomed over the speakers placed throughout the arena, and Tarrlok settled back in his seat to watch. But it wasn’t the matches he was watching – no, he kept his eyes on the police officers patrolling the entrances, and the audience itself.

The match was almost over before anything worth seeing happened, at least from Tarrlok’s point of view. He had all but given up on the Equalists, when he noticed a disturbance among a crowd of cheering fans. There was a sizzle and a blue flash. Lightning? Was a firebender causing trouble?

No. There it was again. It was a woman from the audience. A black bandana hid the bottom half of her face. As Tarrlok watched, she reached out and touched the police officer stationed at the end of her aisle. The man jerked and fell, and the woman – an Equalist, Tarrlok was certain as he caught sight of the strange mechanized glove on her hand – moved on.

Standing, he leapt up on top of the bench he’d been sitting on, casting his gaze about for Lin. He found her just as one of the Equalists put an electrified glove to the metal of her armor, too late to call out a warning. Tenzin was standing next to her. He went down just as hard.

His eyes widening in rage, Tarrlok inhaled deeply through his nose, reaching deep, deep down into that dark part of himself that he tried to deny existed.

He was better than his father. He’d devoted his life to proving it. He would rule the city legitimately, without gangs or bloodbending.

But for Lin? For Lin, Tarrlok would do what he had sworn never to do.

He raised his hands in a waterbending stance, his fingers curved into wicked claws. The Equalists standing over Lin and Tenzin froze in their tracks, unable to move.

Tarrlok sent them flying into the water at the bottom of the arena with a flick of his wrists. Anyone who dared to approach the unconscious Chief of Police met the same fate. In the chaos of the attack, no one noticed the people being flung about by a seemingly invisible force, or the man in the faded red shirt standing on top of a bench.

Once he saw Lin get up, Tarrlok let out a breath he hadn’t been aware he was holding. Sure that she would be fine now that she was back on her feet, and not caring what happened to Tenzin, he turned and found the nearest Equalist that was around his size. Using bloodbending to slam the man into a wall, he took the Equalist’s weapons and mask and put them on.

Then he simply walked out of the arena with a group of Amon’s supporters.

**-l-**

Tarrlok waited at the Bei Fong Estate for hours, but Lin never came home.

Worry gnawing at his gut, he found the dispatch radio Lin kept in her study and turned the frequency knob until he heard chatter. That was how he learned of the metalbenders taken by the Equalists.

How he learned that Chief Bei Fong had been sent for medical care.

He wasn’t really aware of his trip to the hospital. He moved as if in a fog. He blinked and then suddenly found himself behind the wheel of his Satomobile, pulling into a parking space.

There were metalbenders at the doors. They let Tarrlok through easily enough. After that it was simple for Councilman Tarrlok to get Chief Bei Fong’s room number. The nurse at the front desk assumed that he needed to speak with Lin about the attack on the probending stadium, and it didn’t hurt that Tarrlok made his face pleasant, turning a charming smile on her.

The smile didn’t reach his eyes, but no one noticed.

He paused outside the door to Lin’s room, taking a deep breath and preparing himself. Whether he was preparing for a fight, or to see Lin hurt, he wasn’t sure.

He opened the door to find Lin lying on a bed, looking bad tempered.

“Lin,” he started, taking a step forward, hands reaching for her.

“What are you doing here, Tarrlok?” Tenzin’s voice cut through the air.

Tarrlok stopped short, then looked over his shoulder. Tenzin was sitting in a chair in the corner of the room not visible from the doorway, his orange and yellow Air Nomad robes a bright spot of color in the otherwise drab room.

“Yes, Councilman Tarrlok,” Lin echoed, her eyes darting between the two men. “What are you doing here?”

Tarrlok frowned, all of his worry twisting into rage in an instant. He let his hands fall back to his sides.

“I came to see how our esteemed Chief of Police is after her crushing defeat at the hands of the Equalists,” he sneered.

Tenzin stood, moving to stand between Tarrlok and Lin.

And how perfect that was! Tarrlok felt his lip curl.

How symbolic.

No matter where Tarrlok was, no matter how long he waited, Tenzin always stood between him and Lin. She claimed otherwise but…

Tarrlok didn’t believe her.

“I think you should leave,” Tenzin intoned, frown lines wrinkling the arrow tattooed on his forehead.

“I came to speak with Chief Bei Fong,” Tarrlok replied, staring at Tenzin’s chest. He refused to crane his neck to try to see Lin around the taller man.

“She’s injured. Whatever poison you’ve come to drip in her ear – ”

“I can speak for myself, Tenzin,” Lin interrupted. Tarrlok could tell by the tone in her voice that she was more than vexed with the airbender. That gave him some small comfort.

 “Lin!” Tenzin protested.

“Go wait in the lobby, Tenzin. I can handle Tarrlok myself,” Lin ordered, as immovable as a mountain.

Tenzin sputtered for a few seconds, but relented when Lin glared at him. He left the room in a swirl of robes.

 Everything was silent for a few minutes. Tarrlok looked at Lin, and she looked back. That was all.

Then Tarrlok sat on the edge of the bed, resting his hands on top of Lin’s. He could see bandages peeking from beneath her blankets, wrapped around her shoulder. “How bad?” he asked, voice soft.

“Not very. Bumps, bruises. A dislocated shoulder. I’ll be out as soon as the healer signs my release papers.”

Lin sounded detached. Tarrlok guessed she was in more pain than she was willing to admit.

“They said on the radio that you fell a long way.”

“I’ve fallen before.”

“Not like this.”

Lin looked away.

Tarrlok stroked her hand, his jaw tensed to hold back the vicious diatribe frothing behind his teeth.

“You’re going to use this, aren’t you? To take my job from me?” she said at last.

“ _No_ ,” Tarrlok hissed, squeezing Lin’s hands until the bones ground together. “I’m going to use this to save your life.”

Lin pulled her hands away. “The city is at war. My men are out there. I owe them a duty. I _will_ bring them home. Inside the law or outside of it, you can’t keep me from that. You won’t.”

“There are other police officers in the city. There are other people who can find them and save them,” Tarrlok ranted, not noticing how his voice climbed in pitch and volume. He grabbed Lin by the shoulders, just stopping himself from shaking her when she looked at him with those jade green eyes. “Why does it have to be you?” he demanded.

Lin kissed him. It was soft. Gentle. It made Tarrlok feel swinish and vulgar, to be shown this sweetness in the face of his brutality.

He relaxed his hands, sliding them up Lin’s neck to tangle in her hair. Their kisses were usually passionate struggles for dominance, burning Tarrlok from head to toe with both lust and complex emotions he never cared to examine too closely.

This was something new.

Lin pulled back. “You should go. Tenzin will get suspicious.”

And just like that, their sweet moment turned to ash. It seemed Tarrlok could have nothing that wasn’t tarnished by the airbender’s touch.

“Of course,” he snarled, tossing his hair behind his head, his hands curling into fists. He didn’t bother to hide his anger, his hurt, from Lin. He wanted her to see it.

“Tarrlok…”

“What?”

Lin sighed. “Nothing.”

Nodding, Tarrlok stood to leave. He paused before opening the door. “I’m calling for you to step down in the morning.”

“I know.” Lin sounded resigned.

“I’m doing it to protect you,” Tarrlok pressed on.

“I know,” Lin repeated.


	4. The Blood in His Veins

Things only got worse after the night of the stadium attack. Tarrlok called for Lin’s job, and won. She was forced to step down. 

Though he’d gotten just what he wanted, it didn’t feel like a victory.

She was kept in the hospital for observation. Tarrlok called in some favors in the administration department, getting them to delay her release papers in the hopes of keeping her safe until he had the city back under control.

He ordered a curfew put in place for non-benders. Searches and seizures of Equalist equipment. Raids on factories that had ever been associated with Hiroshi Sato. The council bent before him . In this time of war, he emerged as a leader.

A king.

Perhaps his father would be proud. Tarrlok wasn’t sure.

Though it was all he had ever wanted, he accepted his newfound authority with a sense of unease. Whatever people thought of him, he hadn’t wanted it to come to this. He had wanted to rule the republic, yes, but not because their world was tearing itself apart.

Everywhere he looked, he saw danger. It was almost paralyzing. He felt more and more like the scared little boy who grew up in the Northern Water Tribe, forced to be a bloodbender, forced to hurt animals...

He felt more and more like the boy who had watched his brother disappear into the night, never to be seen again.

So he put every Equalist he found in prison, until the cells overflowed. And then he sent out spies to find more. He wouldn’t let it all happen again. He wouldn’t be powerless again.

He wouldn’t lose Lin the way he had lost Noatok.

He wouldn’t lose the city the way Yakone had.

He wouldn’t let even the Avatar or her friends interfere with the capture of suspected Equalists. When they tried, he had them thrown in jail with the others.

That was when Avatar Korra came to visit.

It didn’t take long for things to escalate to a fight. Korra was determined, and she had a temper. In many ways, she reminded Tarrlok of himself when he was a younger man.

And she was a powerful bender. Almost as good as Noatok had been. She even looked like him, with the way she wore her hair.

But Tarrlok was better. He had a greater mastery of water. Whether it came from being zealously trained by Yakone, or whether it was because water was the only element he could bend, and so he understood things about it that the Avatar could not, he didn’t know. It mattered only that he was able to hold his own.

And then he went further. Not completely certain he could defeat Korra with waterbending alone, at least not quickly, and not without their battle drawing unwanted attention, Tarrlok took a deep breath and opened his eyes wide, sinking into the state of concentration required for his father’s secret skill.

He used bloodbending on Korra.

He could feel every pulse of her veins. Every beat of her heart.

When he had used bloodbending in the arena, against the Equalists, it had been to protect Lin. He did it out of love.

This, too, was an act of love, Tarrlok told himself as he watched Korra fall to the ground.

**-l-**

Tarrlok considered not telling anyone that he had any knowledge of Korra’s disappearance, but when he returned from stowing the Avatar at one of Yakone’s old hideouts, it became apparent that he was going to have to provide some kind of explanation for the damage to his office and the council chamber caused by his fight with Korra.

So he retrieved the Equalist weapons he had taken during the attack on the probending arena, staging things to make it look like he and Korra had been set upon by Chi Blockers.

Then he took a deep breath, electrified himself with the Equalist glove, and slumped over to wait to be found.

 _The moon is bright tonight_ , he thought as its light played over his face.

Then all was darkness.

**-l-**

When Lin heard that Tarrlok had been attacked and Korra taken, she couldn’t breathe for a full ten seconds. It was as if a weight was crushing her chest.

Then she was told that Tarrlok’s bending was still intact and she was able to inhale.

She needed to see him. To make things right between them. He was always so savvy, so in control that Lin often forgot the kind of pressure he was under. It was no wonder they had snapped at each other.

But these attacks, this war they were fighting… It did a lot to put things into perspective.

She’d been foolish, and selfish to make Tarrlok keep their relationship a secret. No wonder he felt she didn’t love him.

She did.

She was just afraid. After Tenzin, and all that pain, she had been afraid. And so she told herself that so long as she and Tarrlok never said ‘I love you’ and no one knew they were together, she was protected. Safe.

But not saying the words out loud didn’t mean they weren’t true.

When she saw Tarrlok again, she would say the words. For everyone to hear. And ask him to move to the Bei Fong Estate. He kept more clothes there than she even owned, so it wouldn’t be a very big change.

Lin smiled a little smile.

But she had a job to do first.

Discharge papers or no discharge papers, she was getting out of bed, getting Korra’s friends out of jail, infiltrating the Equalists, rescuing her men, and saving Korra. In that order.

**-l-**

Tarrlok thought his plan was going well. Everyone was looking for the Avatar among Amon’s followers, and heralding Tarrlok himself as the heroic man who had tried to save her. And now the rest of them would realize how dangerous the Equalists were. They had thought him extreme before, but now, with Korra’s life hanging in the balance, they could all see that what he did was necessary.

But he hadn’t counted on Lin leaving the hospital to join the rescue efforts. With her help, the Avatar’s friends were able to move much more quickly. They discovered Korra wasn’t present in the Equalist holding cells before Tarrlok had had time to plan his next move.

And then there was his assistant, the little rat. The man spied on Tarrlok, and then shouted what he had seen for all and sundry to hear.

That was how he came to this moment. Surrounded, in the damaged council chamber, with the cry of “Bloodbender!” still ringing through the air.

Lin looked at him, and he saw betrayal written across her face.

It hurt that she didn’t hesitate at all. She was ready to believe that he had kidnapped the Avatar, that he was a bloodbender and had been hiding it from her all these years, that maybe he had some sort of nefarious plan for the city. She didn’t cry ‘It can’t be!’

She didn’t even look surprised.

Of course, he _had_ kidnapped the Avatar. He _was_ a bloodbender.

But just because those things were true didn’t mean that it didn’t hurt that Lin was so ready to believe them.

Lin and Tenzin started forward, the Avatar’s friends not far behind. Tarrlok widened his eyes and sucked in a deep breath through his nose, raising his arms.

They all stopped in place as Tarrlok froze the blood in their veins.

One by one, his assailants dropped. Tarrlok moved his fingers, using bending to carefully slow the blood to their brains and lungs in order to knock them unconscious.

He left Lin and Tenzin for last.

_We always hurt the ones we love most._

Tarrlok turned Lin so that she could see Tenzin fall.

“Why?” Lin croaked, fighting past Tarrlok’s bloodbending grip to spit the words at him. “ _Why?!_ ”

Their whole lives were compressed into that single word.

Why had he asked her to dance that night, so long ago? Why had he stayed with her, despite her insistence on secrecy? Why did he join the council? Why did he fight the Equalists? Why did he kidnap Korra, why did he tell so many lies, why did he betray her, why did he spare them now when it would be so easy for him to kill them all?

Tarrlok moved close, his hands still up in a bloodbending stance to keep Lin from being able to strike at him. Pressing his forehead against hers, his answered in a hoarse whisper, “Because I love you.”

He kissed her lips, as gently as she had kissed him that night in the hospital.

Lin spat in his face.

Feeling his ears pound with the blood in his veins, Tarrlok stepped back. With a twist of his wrists, Lin passed out, joining her companions on the floor.

**-l-**

They found Korra out in the snow, near an old cabin just outside the city. She was babbling about Amon, and Tarrlok, and Yakone. Amon had taken the bloodbender.

Tarrlok was Yakone’s son.

Lin felt like a fool.

Everyone rejoiced at finding Korra safe, relatively unharmed. It was better than they had all hoped for when they set out to rescue her, thinking she was in Amon’s clutches and in danger of having her bending taken.

But Lin sat apart from the others, her back stiff, clutching at the sleeves of her coat. Everything she had ever thought she knew about Tarrlok was a lie.

He had shared her bed for ten years. She wondered now if any of their tender moments, the playfulness, the fights – had any of it been real at all? Or was it all some giant manipulation, some tangled web of deceit designed for an end that made sense only to Tarrlok?

When she thought how she had pledged herself only that morning, vowing to set things right between them and declare their relationship for all to see…

She gripped her sleeves harder.

 _I love you_ , he had whispered, even as he turned her own body against her, her muscles seizing and spasming with pain.

How silly it all seemed now, her recent worries of being left for a younger woman yet again.

This was worse.


	5. The Scratches On the Floor

Tarrlok woke in a dingy cell. His clothes were dirty and torn, and his long hair was tangled. It took him several long moments to remember what had happened.

Amon had found the place where Tarrlok was keeping Korra. They fought. Tarrlok used bloodbending.

And Amon resisted.

Then Tarrlok’s muscles where twitching, pain shooting through his limbs with every throb of his heart. It had been a long time since he felt it, but he recognized the sensation.

Amon was a bloodbender. A bloodbender capable of using bloodbending without a full moon.

A bloodbender stronger than Tarrlok himself.

There was the sound of footsteps.

Tarrlok looked up to see familiar eyes staring at him from behind a white mask.

“Hello, brother,” Tarrlok said.

Noatok stared for a long time. Tarrlok stared back, unflinching.

Then Noatok left as silently as he came.

**-l-**

Tarrlok realized that his brother had taken his bending away when he tried to escape. The Equalists guarding his cell merely laughed at his attempts to control them with bloodbending, one going so far as to suggest that he should have been a dancer.

The comment reminded Tarrlok of Lin.

He shuddered, his skin crawling and muscles trembling from the aftereffects of Noatok’s bloodbending grip. He closed his eyes, reliving it, the sickening sensation of muscles and veins shuddering.

Tarrlok had used bloodbending on Lin.

His head spun.

Stomach churning, Tarrlok rushed to the bucket they had placed inside his cell, bending over it just as he heaved, bringing up all the gruel and water he had been given to eat in the past few days.

The guards mocked him for being so upset over the loss of his bending. Tarrlok ignored their jibes, sinking to his knees as his hands started to shake harder.

How could he have done that to her? What was he thinking?

Unsteady on his feet, he crawled to the tin pitcher of water sitting on the floor on the opposite side of his cell, intending to rinse his mouth and splash some on his face.

His reflection in the surface of the water made him pause. He had somehow never noticed it before.

He looked just like Yakone.

**-l-**

Noatok became a frequent visitor to Tarrlok’s cell. He was clothed in black from head to toe, the mask of Amon obscuring his face. Tarrlok never saw more than Noatok’s eyes, but knew it was him by the way he moved, and the way he cared for Tarrlok, prisoner though he was.

The guards began to make sure that Tarrlok was a bit cleaner, and had more generous food and water rations once it became clear that it displeased Amon for Councilman Tarrlok to be without.

Tarrlok spoke during their visits, though Noatok never did. He talked about their childhood. Their father. Asked where Noatok had been, all these years. Told his brother about the life he had built in the city, and the mistakes he had made.

Though she was never far from his mind, Tarrlok never mentioned Lin. She was a powerful bender, and sure to cross Noatok at some point. She would never run. Not Lin.

Tarrlok wasn’t sure whether speaking of her would gain her protection, or make her a target in Amon’s eyes. And if she had already been killed, or had her bending taken… he didn’t want to know. He needed to believe she was out there, free, and whole.

So he kept silent.

**-l-**

Tarrlok knew that the city was under siege. At times he could hear distant explosions caused by the fighting on the streets. He could feel vibrations overhead, shaking his cell. War machines, he had to assume. He had no way of gauging the level of conflict, but he had a vague sense that Amon’s forces were winning.

Every day there seemed to be more Equalists swarming through the underground tunnels where Tarrlok was being kept. And they were no longer just extremists. He saw average citizens being led by hardened rebels, on their way to be trained by Chi Blocking Masters.

He wondered if they would have turned to Amon before Tarrlok had instituted his task forces and curfews. Maybe he was the reason things had gone so wrong, so quickly.

In the darkest hours of the night, he wondered if the Equalists were right.

But it wasn’t until Amon had him moved that Tarrlok began to truly despair.

Equalists bound him hand and foot, and threw him in the back of a paddy wagon. He was taken to Air Temple Island, and imprisoned in the attic. There was a window.

Some might have seen it as kindness, but Tarrlok knew that his brother wanted him to watch as Republic City burned.

But that wasn’t the reason he pressed himself to the back wall of his new cage, letting his tangled hair fall over his face to hide the tears gathering in his eyes…

Lin would have never willingly given up Air Temple Island to the Equalists. Not with the last airbenders at stake. That Tarrlok was imprisoned here now meant one of two things.

Lin had either been captured, and her bending taken, or she was dead.

Tarrlok wasn’t sure which was worse.

**-l-**

Tarrlok was woken from a dream of soft skin and green eyes by the sound of voices. Blinking several times, he saw two figures in Equalist uniforms. But those voices were familiar…

“Korra?” he croaked.

“Tarrlok? Is that you?” The Avatar and her companion – was that one Mako or Bolin? Tarrlok still couldn’t keep them straight – seemed to have trouble recognizing him. It was no wonder. The Tarrlok who had been Amon’s prisoner for weeks was a great deal shabbier than the pampered councilman who had delighted in clothes and other fine things.

He was tempted to ask about Lin. Demands to know where she was, if she was safe flittered on the end of his tongue, but never quite made it past his lips. He wasn’t sure why.

Maybe he was afraid of having his worst fears confirmed.

Maybe he felt he no longer deserved her. Had never deserved her.

So he didn’t ask.

Instead, haunted by the betrayal in Lin’s eyes, he told Korra everything she needed to know to defeat Noatok. He told her about their father, their mother, his brother’s rage… The whole long, sad story.

He prayed it was enough.

As Korra and Mako left, leaving Tarrlok in his cell so that no one would know they had been there, Tarrlok hoped that one day, if she was still alive, Lin would hear his story, and maybe she would understand.

Spirits knew he didn’t.

**-l-**

Lin was doing pushups in her jail cell when the door was blown off the hinges. Seconds later she heard Meelo, Tenzin’s son, yelling.

“Hey chief!” one of her men called to her, tossing a metal armguard and its attached metal whip at her feet as he ran by.

Bending, Lin picked up the piece of armor, and put it on. It was difficult, fastening the catches one handed without the help of metalbending, but she managed. Finding the manual release just inside the titanium sleeve, she loosed the metal whip coiled inside the armor, and then experimentally flicked her wrist, sending the whip cracking through the air.

She wasn’t a metalbender anymore, but with the way she managed her weapon as she helped free others trapped in the cells, few realized it.

“Lin, you’re alright!” Tenzin called, running up with Pema in his arms.

Lin flinched away from the sight, but not because she was still uncomfortable with Tenzin and his wife. The strife in the city had done much to bring them all together again.

No, it wasn’t the way Tenzin cradled his wife and new baby that set Lin’s teeth on edge. It was the reminder of her own lover – Tarrlok – and all he had done.

“Let’s go!”

“I can’t find Tarrlok,” Lin retorted, surprised when she realized she had been looking for him.

She didn’t know whether she wanted to save him or kill him herself.

“Leave him,” was Tenzin’s unusually bloodthirsty response.

As an explosion rocked the hall they were standing in, Lin had no choice but to agree.

Swinging her metallic whip back so that it wrapped around her torso, Lin barked, “Follow me!”

**-l-**

Tarrlok scratched at the wooden floor of his prison, his fingers bloody as his skin tore, one of his nails ripped away.  That didn’t matter. Nothing much mattered anymore.

He could see the air machines and the fire in the sky from his little window. He knew the end was at hand. Whichever side won the clash screaming outside his cell, it didn’t matter.

He wouldn’t live to witness whatever order arose from the chaos of battle.

Hearing someone coming, Tarrlok scrabbled to pull his dirty blanket over the floor. When Noatok emerged from the ladder leading to the airy space where Tarrlok was being kept, Tarrlok was reclining leisurely on top of the fabric, his bloody hands hidden in his pockets.

Amon wasn’t wearing his mask.

“Noatok,” Tarrlok said, looking up at his brother.

“It's over, brother,” Noatok spoke directly to Tarrlok for the first time. “I'm sorry for what I had to do to you.”

_“I’m doing this to protect you,” Tarrlok insisted. “I know,” Lin replied._

Tarrlok sighed, looking down at the floor, at the place he had carefully covered with his blanket. “Our father set us on this path. Fate caused us to collide.” He looked up. “I should have left with you when we were boys.”

_“I thought about running away from home once,” Tarrlok said to Lin. “I should have joined the circus.”_

There was a rattle of keys. Noatok pushed the cell door open. “Leave with me now. We have a second chance. We can start over, together.”

_“Dance with me?” Tarrlok smiled, pulling on Lin’s hands._

“Please,” Noatok’s voice broke. “You are all I have left in the world.”

Tarrlok stood and went with his brother.

It seemed like it should have been harder for the pair of them to make their way through the city. But without his mask, no one recognized Noatok as Amon, and Tarrlok hardly resembled the villainous councilman with his hair tangled and his clothes stained. They were just another pair of brothers, trying to stay together, trying to reach safety, trying to stay out of the fighting.

They reached the marina after only a few hours of working their way through the streets. Tarrlok hadn’t had to sail for years, but he was of the Northern Water Tribe.

It was in his blood.

Soon waves were lapping against the sides of their small speedboat, the rocking of the sea soothing Tarrlok’s nerves. Noatok stood at the prow, steering, while Tarrlok slouched at the stern, sprawled over the seat as he contemplated what he had set out to do.

He had never taken Lin sailing. He should have.

Noatok looked back at him, still possessed of his preternatural sense for gauging Tarrlok’s moods.

“The two of us together again,” Noatok said in that enthusiastic tone of voice he had always used to cheer Tarrlok up. “There's nothing we can't do!”

_Lin shook her head. “Really helping someone – really caring for someone means doing it even when it’s inconvenient for you.”_

“Yes, Noatak,” Tarrlok mumbled, casting his eyes around the boat.

“Noatak. Huh,” his brother smiled. “I had almost forgotten the sound of my own name.”

Tarrlok’s gaze caught on one of the Equalists’ mechanized gloves, then darted to the boat’s fuel cap. Both were in easy reach.

Moving silently and quickly, Tarrlok unscrewed the cap, and then slid his hand into the glove.

Everything he had done since arriving in Republic City had been selfish. Designed to serve his own vanity. He had lived a life of lies, even to – especially to – himself.

With this one act, he would atone. With this one act, he would be redeemed.

Worthy.

“It will be just like the good old days,” Tarrlok promised.

_Lin tossed her head back, the scars on her cheeks standing out as she laughed, and Tarrlok thought she was beautiful. “I’m the Chief of Police. Honesty is better.”_

He put his hand over the open gas tank of the boat, and activated the glove.

**-l-**

As soon as they had secured Air Temple Island, Lin headed directly for the cell where Korra and Mako had told her Tarrlok was being kept. She didn’t know what she was going to say to him, but she knew it was going to be loud, and quite possibly involve every swear word she’d ever heard.

But when she climbed the ladder, her head snapping to the right, she didn’t see anyone.

The barred door stood open, the cell empty.

Tarrlok was gone.

Escaped again, the devil.

Determined to find some clue as to his whereabouts, Lin searched the cell, overturning a pitcher of water, and kicking a tattered blanket aside.

There were scratches on the floor.

Kneeling, she traced her fingers over letters carved into the wood, stained along the edges with dried blood. Her hands shook, and she didn’t know why. She read the words, and didn’t understand why Tarrlok had left them there.

_Still honest._

_I loved her._


End file.
